Say “yes” to…

Fulfilling relationships.
Lasting Intimacy.
Incredible Sex. 

I AM SO GLAD YOU'RE HERE

I’m Ilil Lunkry, an Intimacy, Sex & Relationship Coach.

My life’s work is helping people deepen intimacy, find lasting fulfilment in their relationships, and experience true erotic aliveness. You deserve to live a life filled with pleasure, connection, and love – and you can, with a little support, guidance and practise.

Certified Sexologist by American Board of Sexology
Somatica® Certified & Somatica® Couples Trained
Certified Youth Sex Educator

Are you ready to begin?

Appointments offered online worldwide or in-person in Nelson, New Zealand.

OFFERINGS

COUPLES COACHING

Create the intimate relationship that you so deeply desire. In our couples coaching sessions, you and your partner will learn the practical skills to strengthen your bond, increase intimacy and resolve conflict.

INDIVIDUALS COACHING

Reach your full potential for pleasure, intimacy, and love. Whether you have a specific issue you’d like to work on or if you’re just curious to learn more about yourself, I am here to guide and support you, every step of the way.

WORKSHOPS & EVENTS

Learn life-changing skills that can transform your relationships, sex and intimacy. Integrating theory with experiential learning, my workshops are the perfect opportunity to learn, share and grow.

What can I help you with?

BUILD A THRIVING RELATIONSHIP

  • Reawaken desire and intimacy in sexless relationships.

  • Gap differing levels of sexual desires.

  • Bring novelty and playfulness into the bedroom.

  • Develop secure attachment and build a resilient relationship.

  • Learn to repair and resolve underlying resentment and tension.

  • Build healthy communication skills.

  • Understand love languages and attachment styles.

  • Navigate non-monogamy and other relationship structures.

  • Reconnect after major life changes such as children, grief, or trauma.

  • Rebuild trust after infidelity.

FEEL EROTICALLY
EMPOWERED

  • Explore your erotic blueprint and what turns you on and off.

  • Increase your capacity to feel aroused and experience pleasure.

  • Master the art of flirting.

  • Build confidence and learn new lovemaking skills.

  • Explore your fantasies.

  • Expand your sexual menu.

  • Cultivate a healthy self-pleasure practise.

  • Process and let go of fear, shame, and negative past experiences.

  • Adapt to your changing sexuality with ageing.

OVERCOME SEXUAL CHALLENGES

  • Low libido or decreased desire

  • Difficulty to orgasm

  • Pain or discomfort during sex

  • Erectile dysfunction

  • Unreliable ejaculation

  • Manage sexual anxiety and insecurity.

  • Address body shame and other limiting inhibitions.

  • Heal the wounds of past traumas and negative experiences.

  • Navigate tricky turn ons.

Whatever you’re experiencing, I promise that there is a way to work through it.

And I am here to help. 

MY APPROACH

True change takes practice, support and guidance.

Radically different from traditional talk therapy, my holistic approach bridges the gap between mind and body. Drawing on the latest research in neuroscience and sexual psychology, my coaching combines deep conversation and education components with experiential learning. You will not just come to have a better understanding of yourself, but will be able to fully integrate and embody that knowledge in your everyday life.

Somatica® Certified Sex & Relationship Coach
Somatica® Couples Trained
Certified Sexologist - American Board of Sexology
Certified Sex Educator

WORKSHOPS & EVENTS

THREE-PART WORKSHOP
New Zealand
Dates TBC

HALF-DAY WORKSHOP
New Zealand
Dates TBC

KIND WORDS

★★★★★

“This is the most useful workshop I have ever taken ”

Everyone should learn relationship repair!

For years my wife and I got frustrated when trying to have conversations about our feelings and emotions. Now we finally know what to do. I learned how to listen with empathy and hold her in her feelings rather then trying to fix or defend myself. She now feels heard and secure .

The skills I have learned from this workshop has changed our marriage in so many ways. I love my wife and appreciate her in a whole new way .

Thank you so much Ilil!

- Rob -

★★★★★

“Learning the tools of relationship repair radically transformed our marriage.”

We finally have the tools, awareness and actual experience in navigating challenging conversations.

Because we are able to have these vulnerable conversations, I now feel much more open and attracted to my husband.

I can’t believe we don’t learn this in school.

- Susan -

★★★★★

“I feel safe to explore these intimate topics”

If you want a coach that truly empowers you to make progress on your path of sexual empowerment and makes the tools and practices so accessible, fun and practical, definitely book in with Ilil.

Ilil is very engaging, a great listener, gives awesome reflections and affirmations. With Ilil I feel so safe to explore these intimate topics every time we talk.

So much gratitude!

- Jess - 

SOMETHING ON YOUR MIND?

GET IN TOUCH

Contact me today by filling out the form below to enquire about my coaching services or schedule your free 15 minute consultation.